The Things You Hear Yourself Saying, Part 3
Stop licking your nose, please.
It doesn’t matter if it’s your hammer, it’s his tummy.
Well, you’re not supposed to like the taste. Now what’s the cat going to eat?
Three is more than two. Yes, it is.
She wasn’t sharing that with you, you’re just stronger than she is.
Who wiped their nose on the couch?
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It's Not All Mary Poppins 
Why do those all sound eerily familiar……?
[gets out brolly and carpet bag]
cq
Mary P said:
She wasn’t sharing that with you, you’re just stronger than she is.
You should get that printed on a T-shirt.
Oh.. and this one:
Well, you’re not supposed to like the taste. Now what’s the cat going to eat?
Licking the nose? That is one long tongue–a young Gene Simmons? Or maybe kids are proportioned differently…
CQ: I have an ongoing draft file entitled “The things you hear yourself saying”, and pop one in whenever I come out with a good one. When I heard myself asking who’d wiped their nose on the couch, I knew I had enough to publish another edition!
CK: There! T-shirts that are perfectly mine, with no worry of copyright violations. There was an old one I particularly liked. I’ll have to hunt it up.
Cheryl: No, they’re not proportioned differently, at least not in the mouth-to-nose area. No, this boy just has a disturbingly long tongue. Rather revolting, truth be known. I swear some days he picks his nose with it… And we all say together: EeeEeEEeeewwwWWwWWwww!
How ’bout this:
“Please don’t play with your penis at the dinner table.”
And no, it wasn’t my husband that I was talking to.
Get your hands out of your pants
I don’t care if she likes it, you’re not to do it
Put him/her/it down
What have I told you about playing with (wires/lights/fire/televisions/sharp knives…..)
SNMartha: In the world of small boys, there is no time or place in this world that is not a good one for playing with your penis. Thus it ever was, thus it is, thus it will be, world without end. Amen.
MrsA: Ah, motherspeak.
My 20 month old daughter has taken up the phrase “Get down RIGHT now!” because she’s heard it a billion times it seems from me. She’s decided that every stationary object in the house is fair game to climb on. Hence the reason there is no pretty decorations on any table within her reach.
Who got hammered in the tummy? Yikes!
I do like the t-shirt idea!
SNMartha and Mary, I’m so glad to know my son is “normal!” ; )
I finally quit telling him to stop–just told him to wash his hands. He washes his hands a lot.
Jill: Does she say it to herself when she’s climbing something? I’ve seen kids scold themselves for the very activity they’re indulging in – they know what comes next, but the drive to do it is too strong!!
Lory: It was a small, light plastic hammer. It was little Zach, and he objected, but through his denim overall bib and sweatshirt, I doubt it hurt.
Looking back in my archives, I found the first edition of this theme on June 27/05, (the things you hear yourself saying), and, as I’d thought, the third one on the list was, “If you need to touch that, go to the bathroom.” It’s more than normal, it’s universal; he’d be abnormal if he didn’t!
LOL
In the world of small boys, there is no time or place in this world that is not a good one for playing with your penis. Thus it ever was, thus it is, thus it will be, world without end. Amen.
I just want to second that Amen.
Hallelujah!, even.
Q
Q: YOU are not a small boy. (Which is a good thing, of course.) But let me reiterate: NOT.
A boy and his penis are never parted…. and men never do really grow up…..
CK: I’d noticed that…
congrats to ck and q for effectively killing the conversation by discussing their penises.
men!
🙂
Line from new TV Series on BBC…called Blessed.
“Of course he can’t help, he’s two. He has one hand permanently attached to his nose and the other to his penis”
So true, we have considered recording the line “Get your hand out of your pants” and just playing it back on a continuous loop to Agi Junior.
CQ: Oh, there’s a time and a place for everything… LOL
Aginoth: Love that quote. For one of my daycare tots, the line would have to be modified to “His tongue up his nose and his hands in his pants”. Heavy sigh.
And today we followed up the “hands off the penis at mealtime” with:
“Put it back in it’s little pocket and leave it alone.”
Tighty Whities are a baaad idea for 3 years old boys
Boxers have to be worse: they can get at it from top AND bottom! Boys and their toys – the fascination never goes away.
Well… it IS a gift that keeps on giving………….
Oh, enough already! She rolls her eyes. It’s really not as interesting as you think it is.
Now which cousin of mine was it that was told by his exasperated mother: “If you don’t stop playing with that thing it’s going to fall off”?
(And, of course, the result was his holding onto it more so that he wouldn’t lose it)