It’s Not All Mary Poppins

Just a Normal Conversation…

Saturday morning at Mary’s house, kidful version. Last weekend was the kidfree version. Players are Mary, Big Stepson (Big) age 17; Little Stepson (Little), age 10; and the wonderful Stephen, partner of Mary and father to stepsons. Small background detail: BigSon has his learner’s permit (now called a G1, I think) which allows him to drive only if there is a licensed driver in the car in the passenger seat alongside him.

Little: Daddy, do you have a big playing card, a regular sized one, and a small playing card?

Stephen: You want three cards?

Little: No, two. A big one – you know, like a regular sized one – and a small one.

Stephen: Oh. No, I don’t.

Big: What do you need the cards for?

Little: I’m not telling. We don’t have ANY cards?

M: We used to, but I have no idea where they are now.

Big: That’s because people like YOU keep losing them. [He fixes his small brother with a meaningful – and friendly – stare.]

Little: Meeeeeeee???

Talk moves to my plans for the day, and a possible need for a ride downtown for me. We have one vehicle, many children with many activities. The logistics need to be worked out carefully.

Stephen: BigSon needs to get his license. If he had his license, he could drive you downtown….

Big: I could drive her downtown…

Stephen: Well, yes you could, but then she’d have to come back with you, and..

Big and Stephen, together:… what would be the point of that? Bwah-hahahaha
(Like father, like son.)

Stephen: I guess I could drive you, if you want to go.

Small: Drive me, daddy? Where?

Stephen: No, not you. Mary.

Big: Yes, you! We’re going to drive you downtown and leave you there.

Stephen: Yes, and you can stop people on the street and ask them if they have a big playing card and a small playing card.

M: Did we ever find out what he needs the playing cards for?

Little: I forget.

Big: And I have to go to work now, anyway.

Little: I didn’t think you wanted to go today.

Big: Not particularly, no.

Little: Well, don’t go!

Big: You can’t just not show up because you don’t feel like it that day.

Stephen: Yeah. That’s why it’s called a “Rat trap”.

M: You mean the “rat race.”

Stephen: Yeah.

Little: Don’t go! [Falls dramatically at Big’s large feet, arms outstretched, pathos oozing from his every syllable and cell.]

Big: Well, you could always come with me. Be the cute little kid and be bored for five hours.

Little: Not me! I don’t want to be in the rat pack.

Stephen: No, you just want some playing cards.

Little: Yeah!

February 25, 2006 - Posted by | random and odd, the things they say!


  1. Wait, I’m confused. Which step-son has a job? I think maybe their numbers got reversed… Cute story though!

    Comment by Haley | February 25, 2006 | Reply

  2. There. Fixed. Even I was having trouble tracking the SS1 and SS2 thing: now they’re “Big” and “Little”.

    Comment by Mary P. | February 25, 2006 | Reply

  3. Sounds like my house – I call them Alice in Wonderland conversation

    Comment by Granny | February 25, 2006 | Reply

  4. What a fun conversation! Did you record it? I can never remember mine well enough by the time I get a chance to actually write. Sure, I’ve fudged a little bit here and there, but I try to stay true to the main theme.

    Comment by Andie D. | February 25, 2006 | Reply

  5. Kia Ora Mary,

    Thanks for putting a pin on my map.

    Ka Kite,

    Jarvis Tahi & House Dad

    Comment by House Dad | February 26, 2006 | Reply

  6. so did you get downtown?
    who drove ya?
    did little ever get his cards?

    these are unanswered questions…ahhh for another post on another day.

    i dred the day my son gets his learners permit. *sigh*

    Comment by kimmyk | February 26, 2006 | Reply

  7. Granny: Any minute a white rabbit in a hurry is bound to appear… It has that feeling to it!

    Andie: I can type at a decent speed, so when it started to get silly I hauled the laptop open and started transcribing as it was ongoing, then went back and filled in a bit here and there. It’s pretty much word-for-word. (No one knew what I was doing – steath transcription!)

    House Dad: Kia Ora, HD. Welcome! Feel free to return the favour – the link to the map is the coloured Frappr box in the sidebar to the left. “Kia Ora” – Maori greeting? “Ka kite” – goodbye?

    kimmyk: [cue dramatic music] “Will our heroine get downtown? Will Little get his cards? Tune in next week to Wonderland Moments for the answers to these and other pressing questions…”

    The answers are: Yes, Q, and No.

    I was hoping to walk, the weather had been so mild all week, but temperatures plunged just for the weekend, and there was a NASTY wind coming out of the north. I’d have had to walk into it all the way. Never mind that!

    Comment by Mary P. | February 26, 2006 | Reply

  8. Well, maybe (in response to the above comments) you could name the stepsons P and R :).

    Just kidding, of course!

    Comment by jen-o-rama | February 26, 2006 | Reply

  9. Jen: P, Q, and R… ar, ar, ar. It took me a minute. I know a family, the mom and dad are J and M, and the two children are K and L, so they sign Christmas cards as J,K,L,M. It always makes me wonder: did they do that on purpose??

    Comment by Mary P. | February 26, 2006 | Reply

  10. I have no idea why that was so amusing. But it was. 🙂

    Comment by chosha | February 28, 2006 | Reply

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