How We Do It (part one?)
I’m told this so often I don’t really even hear it any more. “I don’t know how you do it!” I’m not quite sure what “it” is, exactly, and many times, I suspect that I am not in fact doing the “it” the person thinks I am.
I think sometimes people believe that the good behaviour they see with me is magical. Because everyone knows that kids behave better for other people than their parents, right? (No, I don’t know that. You may think you have seen it, but as a caregiver, I can usually see any number of very clear reasons why this may be happening. It is not unavoidable, it is certainly not just the nature of things.)
My days sometimes have some screaming in them, yes, they do. My days often have tears in them. Rarely mine, but that’s been known to happen. (Really.) My days rarely have tantrums, but they do have temper. (Again, not generally mine, but it’s been known to happen. I am human.) We have power struggles, of course we do! I’m working with 2-year-olds. We have power struggles, which.I.win.
Here’s a good example of a caregiver having a struggle. In this case, she’s bravely changing her patterns for something healthier, so she’s having to re-train several toddlers, who have been used to something different, in the same behaviour at one time. Now that’s courage.
Just so you know that all that sweetness you see when a caregiver goes by with her wee charges is not accomplished without some sweat!