It’s Not All Mary Poppins

Endless Loop

You know how sometimes you can be ten minutes into something before it occurs to you how goofy it is?

I have two children in front of me. Nigel, who needs to get his shoes on, and Emily, who needs her coat zipped. For this operation, Nigel needs to sit, and Emily needs to stand. (Emily’s very round belly precludes you zipping her coat when she sits – you can’t find the toggle under the curve!)

I have the bottom of each half of Emily’s zipper in my hands. I will do Nigel’s shoes next. First he needs to take his slippers off.

“Nigel, lovie. Sit down, please.”
Nigel sits down. Emily sits down. Now I can’t find the zipper.

“Hey, Miss Moo. Stand up.”
Emily stands. Nigel stands.

“No, Nigel. You need to take those slippers off. Sit down.”
Nigel sits. Emily sits. Damn! I just got the tab into the zipper! Now I’ve lost it.

“Emily, lovie. Stand up, please.”
Emily stands. Nigel stands.

“Nigel, for goodness’ sake! I was talking to Emily! Sit down!”
Nigel sits. Emily sits.

“Emily, I can’t get the zipper on if you’re sitting. Please, stand up.”
Emily stands. Nigel stands.

Help! I’m trapped in an endless loop!
You know, this is very silly. I think we can stop this now…

I ignore Nigel. Zip up Emily’s coat.
“Nigel, time to take those slippers off. Sit down, please.”

Nigel sits.

Emily sits.


June 7, 2007 Posted by | Emily, Nigel, peer pressure | 10 Comments