Healthy Insanity…
keeps you sane.
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.
3. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “In”.
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write “For Smuggling Diamonds”.
7. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
8. Specify that your drive-through order is “to go”.
9. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream “I Won! I Won!”
10. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, “Run for your lives! They’re loose!”
11. Tell your children over dinner, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”
12. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity …
Come up with a few of these on your own. We’ll call it therapy!
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Get dressed up in fancy clothes and high heels to do housework. Or dress like a fairy. I’ve honestly done both and it makes cleaning much more fun.
Not that this is entirely along the same lines but My uncle once told me about a one legged friend of his that would go swimming and strap his prosthesis to his back and hop out of the water yelling SHARK SHARK.
I love to skip.
I soooo love the coffee one:-)
Ah, Mary, you always have a way of giving me the giggles just when I need it the most! Already this week is driving me to pull my hair out – and, it’s ONLY Tuesday! Thank you for these healthy doses of sanity. My particular faves are numbers 3, 5, 10, and 11. (psst, I think you forgot #4)
Hugs to you!
I love reading these! They just make me laugh out loud!
These are great!
The only thing I’ve ever done similar to this was spend a morning at church barefoot. (It was for a sociology class; the assignment was to break a social norm and observe the results. I certainly got some strange looks.)
Stand in the middle of a busy place, look up and point and shake your head, when a crowd gathers simply walk away and watch how long it takes for them to realise theres nothing there…
Kate: Fancy clothes and heels, and pretend that you’re June Cleaver!! She may not have had an exciting life, but she seemed very content in it…
Bill: Good lord. And is he still alive, or has he been beaten to death with his prosthesis by irate survivors of those killed by the heart attacks he provoked? Guess a dark sense of humour helps.
Peter: With the girls, or all by yourself? With a skipping rope, or just around the house on your own two feet?
JM: So did I. Because, though they may claim otherwise, most people cannot tell the difference. Heh.
Mama’s Moon: You’re right! The list was about 20 items long, in fact, but I only posted my favourites. I thought I’d corrected the numbers, but I goofed. I’m glad they gave you a necessary giggle. 🙂
Karly: As they did me – glad they had the same effect on you. A good laugh is the best way to start your day.
Alison: Oh, I love that assignment! Though it would take some courage to actually do it.
Jenny: Ha! This is brilliant! I love it!
This is wonderful!
Mary P you’ll have to ask my Uncle M I have no more details than that.