It’s Not All Mary Poppins

Bo-bos and bannaids

“…and a cock-a-doodle doo! Everybody promenade two by two.”
“Two by two!” Emily loves to parrot the lines in the book.

We sit snuggled on the couch. To make room for the tree, the couch has been shifted so that it blocks the arch between living and dining rooms. Nigel and Anna play on the dining room floor behind us.

“It’s a bannaid!”
“Yes, I got a bannaid, and you gots a bannaid!”

There are no bandaids on this floor of the house. Isn’t it cute when they play pretend?

“I got a bo-bo, and I putta bannaid on my bo-bo.”
“I got a bo-bo on my tummy!”
“I got a bo-bo on my bum!”

A wooden rattle of the small, primary-coloured blocks in the bin. “Here’s a bleee-oo bannaid for you, Nigel. You wanna bleee-oo bannaid?”

“No, I wanna red one.”

And you thought Mary was mistaken and they were going to be plastering the dining room with real bandaids, didn’t you? No, they’re using blocks. Isn’t that just so cute?

“Here, Emmy, love. You can look at the book some more while I go make lunch, okay?” Anna and Nigel squat amongst a brilliant sea of shiny blocks, still chattering about bo-bo’s and bannaids. Anna taps a “bannaid” on Nigels shoulder. “There! Does that feel all better?”

So cute.

When the children are called for lunch, they commence to scrambling up onto the benches. Anna and Nigel kneel in front of their plates.

“Sitting on the benches, you two. You’ll fall off if you don’t sit on your bum”

They wiggle, but they do not sit.

“Anna? Nigel? Sit down, please. On your bums.”

Anna sits, then kneels up again. Nigel doesn’t sit at all. Overt defiance calls for immediate response. My tone is level and no-nonsense.

“Anna. Nigel. You sit on the bench.”

I approach Nigel, lift him and sit his bottom on the bench, and then nearly drop him on his head. His howl of pain is instant and sincere. What? I didn’t drop him onto the bench. I just sat him down. And he’s kneeling again!

“My bum! My bum hurted me! My bannaid hurted my bum!”

???

He squirms in near agony. His bum hurts too much to even sit on it?

I peel the diaper off, to reveal … three small, brightly-coloured blocks. A yellow semi-circle, a green rectangular prism, and a blue cube. Anna’s contains a red cylinder and a blue cube.

???

“Why are their blocks in your diapers, you two?”

“Because it’s a bannaid. A bannaids for the bo-bo on my bum!”

Oh.

And there are seventy-eleven MORE “bannaids” in a bin on the dining room floor, and heaven knows how many of those saw active butt bo-bo duty.

Guess I know what I’ll be doing during nap-time today…

December 14, 2007 - Posted by | Anna, eeewww, health and safety, Mischief, Nigel

7 Comments »

  1. God bless clorox!

    Comment by Jennifer | December 14, 2007 | Reply

  2. Amen, sistah!

    Comment by MaryP | December 14, 2007 | Reply

  3. heh. I know what it was immediately because Pumpkinpie has been dropping blocks down the back of her footie PJS and finding it really funny, but I have to empty her out before dinner!

    Comment by kittenpie | December 14, 2007 | Reply

  4. Oh that is hysterical! At least they were blocks that could be cleaned easily. (I hope!) 🙂

    Comment by Dani | December 14, 2007 | Reply

  5. Some days, you’re the person whose job I’m glad I don’t have! (And I worked in administration at a zoo for four years, so I know there’s always a job that’s worse.) I laughed, though – couldn’t help it. Hope those blocks are nice and clean now…

    Comment by Florinda | December 14, 2007 | Reply

  6. Perhaps it’s my experience with toddlers or maybe your foreshadowing ability, but I saw that coming.

    Hehehehe.

    Admire and respect you, damn straight. Envy you, not a chance. 😛

    Comment by Sheri | December 16, 2007 | Reply

  7. Oh my goodness Mary. I saw that one coming too. Man that was hysterical. My sides are always hurting(from laughing!) after reading your blog!

    Comment by Nanny Sarah | December 17, 2007 | Reply


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