It’s a perk of parenting

“Four crackers for you! And one, two, three, four pieces of cheese! ”
“One … two… three… four crackers for you! And one, two, three, four pieces of cheese.”
“One … two… three… four crackers for you! And one, two, three, four pieces of cheese.

Mary makes her way around the table, dispensing snack. You may not have noticed this, it’s pretty subtle, but we’re having crackers. And cheese. Four pieces each.

“Mary, are we have crackers for snack?” (Told you it was subtle.)

“No, we’re having squirrel.” Said with a warm, supportive smile. I am not sneering at the child, but you know, as with any job, you take your entertainment where you find it.

“Oh, okay.” (Which only encourages me.)

My son, loitering in the dining room before heading out to work, chortles. “You know,” he observes, “I think that will be one of the fun things about being a parent. You could just randomly re-label something, and always call it that, and they’d never know the difference.”

“Assuming you could get your wife to go along with the joke, of course.”

He doesn’t respond to my corollary, too caught up in the pictures in his imagination. “Can you see him, coming home from preschool?

‘What’d you have for lunch today, son?’

‘Rottweiler’.”

Son’s laughter bursts from his throat. The children, with no idea of the joke, are caught up in the enthusiasm. Deep man-guffaws and baby giggles bounce around the room.

Oh, yeah. He’s going to make a great dad.