It’s Not All Mary Poppins

Pet Peeve: Ease up, already!

I am a positive person. A pragmatic optimist. I don’t expect perfection of myself or those around me; I can roll with the punches, I can go with the flow, and I can draw that line in the sand and stop that buck right here. (I can mix my metaphors like all get-out, too.)

In short, I tend to see the bright side of things. I’m sure it shows here. I’m sure you wonder about that.

“Yeah, she talks sunshine and light, but come on. She HAS to get aggravated at times. She HAS to lose her patience now and then. She HAS to get pissed off once in a while.”

And of course, you’re right. So, in the interests of fair and accurate reportage, I will start a new feature. I have no idea how often it will feature, but, starting today, there’s going to be a new category: Peeve Me.

And the first one?

cryingbabyA baby signals the end of naptime by crying for me. This is okay. Babies do not talk. They cannot call me to them with a lilting “MA-REEE!”

I hasten to them. I enter the room, calling out soft, soothing words to announce my presence. I scoop the soft, warm bundle into my loving arms.

And the little bugger cries louder. WAY louder.

Some kids do this. Maybe takes them a minute or two to realize their incarceration is over, maybe they’re just burning off steam, maybe they’re giving me what-for for this whole “nap” business, I don’t know.

But it irritates the ever-loving sh poop right out of me. “Hey! I’m here! I came when you rang! I got here as quick as I could, and I’m doing exactly what you want me to do. So QUIT SCREAMING IN MY EAR, ALREADY!”


November 12, 2008 - Posted by | Peeve me, the dark side | ,


  1. Ha! Yes! I also have one who startles frantically when I go get him and say “Hi honey, how was your nap?” I mean really. You cried, did you think I was not coming? Why do I scare the piss out of you

    Snort. You put it so well! I’m still giggling.

    Comment by kelli in the mirror | November 12, 2008 | Reply

  2. My own child does this to me all. night. long.

    And we co-sleep.

    Damn, I’m tired.

    I can’t imagine. You’re still breast-feeding, I’m sure, so no sneaking off into another bed for the night. Because if the cries don’t wake you, the rock-hard breasts will anyway! Damn.

    Comment by Allison | November 12, 2008 | Reply

  3. Yes, Pugsley did that. I think there was something about the transition from sleep to waking during the day that confused him for a minute. However, a couple of days ago, he just came to the door of his room and stood there watching me until I turned round, so maybe he’s grown out of it.

    Hallelujah! How old is Pugsley?

    Comment by Z | November 12, 2008 | Reply

  4. I’d be tempted to try waiting a few minutes after the first cry to see if it was really an “I’m awake, come here!” cry or if it was just the beginning of a transition to wakefulness. If he goes through the same routine with you there or not, but calms afterward, I’d be inclined to wait and let him get it over with before entering. I guess the test is whether or not he calms himself if you don’t come in. That make sense?

    It makes total sense. I never race in there at the first cry — been suckered by that too many times over the years. No, these are wide-awake, full-throttle “WHERE THE HECK ARE YOU” cries that I’m responding to. In fact, I thought he could be annoyed that I’ve made him wait, so I’ve tried getting there RIGHT AWAY. Same reaction. If I wait longer, he gets REALLY, REALLY glass-shattering loud. Nope. Just “one of those babies”, until he outgrows it. Which I know he will. In time. Sigh.

    Comment by Jill in Atlanta | November 12, 2008 | Reply

  5. I get this – it’s the difference between trying to help and nto being able to. For me, if I’m trying hard to get the Bun his milk and rushing around and he’s crying, it makes me crazy – I’m TRYING! – even though I know he doesn’t understand that. But if he’s unhappy and I can’t help him, like when things are moving inside? I feel bad for the little guy instead. Big difference in the emotional state it provokes.

    That makes total sense. For me, there’s the feeling of “Where is your appreciation, you little ingrate?”, even though I know that’s not reasonable at this age, either. But who said emotions were reasonable? 🙂

    Comment by kittenpie | November 12, 2008 | Reply

  6. I’m going to love this new feature- the dark side of Mary P! Coincidentally, is it possible that you are too cheerful when you get him? I don’t generally wake up happy, and nothing pisses me off more than waking to a bunch of sunshine & lollipops! My mom would wholeheartedly agree that I’ve been this way since birth.

    Perhaps I was initially — though, when coming in after a nap, I’m low-key — but you can bet I’m less sunshiney these days… 😛

    Comment by MJH | November 12, 2008 | Reply

  7. I’m heartless. I wait until they pipe down, and then I go in. Or, if they cry when I go in, I wait about a minute before picking them up. By the time I make the gesture for up, they’re so relieved, the wailing stops immediately. (Of course, there’s also the wailing when one twin is offended that she’s not picked up FIRST, but there’s nothing I can do about that.)

    What ticks me off most is when one girl wakes up, screams bloody murder, thus waking the OTHER girl … who screams bloody murder because she was rudely awakened by the banshee next door. Some days, there’s just no winning the game.

    I don’t know how long I’d have to wait for this one to ease up before I’d be going in, and, not wanting all the other sleeping children to wake, I’m probably not going to try. Unless I put him for his nap in the basement, two floor away from the others? He has a cry that could shatter glass… I’ve certainly tried waiting before picking him up: he gets far louder in his outrage. “You there! Why are you not PICKING ME UP?”

    No, I suspect there is no winning for losing with this one. I’m just waiting for him to outgrow it…

    Comment by Kat | November 13, 2008 | Reply

  8. Mmm what gets me is “I hate you”. I know he doesn’t mean it in the adult sense of hate, and more often than not he’ll turn round 2 minutes later and tell me he loves me.
    I don’t know where he gets it from as I don’t think any of the adults around here are particularly negative – in fact L’s Mum is rainbows and sunshine… she’s awesome. It’s just that L loves to voice his disapproval to the point where it’s a habit for him.

    “I hate sausages” (his favourite food)
    “I hate L—s” (his best friend)
    “I hate bedtime. I hate go there. I hate scooter. I hate pushchair”

    “I hate my own self” even!!

    It’s almost as though he’s saying “I’ve noticed….” and is getting hate mixed up for every other emotion…
    He does tend to do it more when he’s tired, and I sympathise, but man! Lighten up!

    I’m confused. “I’ve noticed” and “I hate” are not interchangeable, not if you know what they mean. Does he know the word is a negative? If he says it mostly when he’s tired, it suggests he does.

    Me, I don’t allow that word. Period. It’s like “stupid” and “poo-face” and grown-up words that occasionally make it into their vocabulary. “You silly asshole” was one that appeared last week. Um, no… How about “silly-billy” instead? Oh, okay!!

    Comment by Claire | November 13, 2008 | Reply

  9. […] know how it really, really bugs me when they cry louder when you […]

    Pingback by Applause, applause « It’s Not All Mary Poppins | December 9, 2008 | Reply

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