Life’s little outrages

Rory lifts a tray puzzle from the rack, and then, on his way to the table, tips it upside-down. He stares in astonishment at the pieces strewn across the floor. “Uh-oh! Puzzle!”

Jazz sticks her hand into the mouth of the sleeping puppy. The puppy wakes and takes an enthusiastic nibble of this tempting morsel. Jazz is outraged! “Puppy! Puppy bite!”

Did you know that when you tear pages from a book, you can’t read it any more? That the pages WON’T EVEN TURN??? Like, really, what’s with THAT???

Did you further know that play-dough taste just as bad on the third mouthful as it did on the first??? (Shall we pause for a moment to savour the irony that the same child who persevered to the third bite of play-dough adamantly refuses to ingest a single pea?)

How about this one: when you feed all your pasta to a begging dog, there is NONE LEFT FOR YOU TO EAT? I mean, really, who could have predicted that???

Did you know that when you poke your sister for the eleventy-third time, even though she has told you eleventy-two times to stop, she will POKE YOU BACK? I know! How dare she, right???

Did you know? Did you know any of this stuff? I mean, really, WHO KNEW???