You mis-heard it here
I tweeted this, but it bears repeating.
Jazz and Grace, chanting the familiar rhyme. Many of you know it, I’m sure. It goes like this:
FIVE little monkeys
Jumping on the bed.
ONE fell off and bumped her head.
Mama called the doctor, the doctor said,
“No more monkeys jumping on the bed!”
Next verse, FOUR little monkeys, etc., etc.
Only yesterday, when Jazz and Grace sang it, the doctor’s prescription was slightly different.
Mama called the doctor, the doctor said…
“NO MORE MONKEYS HUMPING ON THE BED!!”
Well, really.
I should say so.
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It's Not All Mary Poppins 
I like the retribution version. Instead of no more it’s “That’s what you get for jumping on the bed.”
You’re suggesting all further humping take place on the floor???
In fact, we use the retribution version — which we learned from you! — but only on the final verse.
Thank you for the laugh this morning, I needed it.
You’re welcome.
No wonder there are so many darn monkeys around.
That would explain it, all right. I think the doctor should be doing more than just scolding.
I reminded one of my boys to work on his attitude of gratitude today, so here is mine: thank you for your delightful stories, advice, and the dose of reality that reminds me that I work with delightful parents. I think of your posts often when my “boss mom” says something like, “I’m going to the store and then coming home before I go to work, but don’t let that get in your way of whatever you had planned for the day,” or when she says, modeling warm enthusiasm and gratitude for her sons, “Little Dudes, do you know how lucky you are to have a nanny who helps you [insert activity from the day]?!” I can’t tell you how often one of your blog posts has reminded me that these are not insignificant utterances to be taken for granted!